I do, I do, I do, I do, I do

So, today's the day that Charles and Camilla finally get to do the time-honoured thing. You know, step onto the dance floor at the reception for the first dance, a nice pile of sentimental slush for them to slide around and smooch to. I know: yeuch.... But what will they choose? Well, statistically speaking, according to a new survey, there's a strong chance it'll be Bryan Adams' Everything I do (I do it for you). Check this survey out because I'm sure there's a fine investigation to be had into what qualities of language (cos let's face it, the appeal can't lie in the quality of the music) make a popular wedding smoocher.

Wedding songs that taste forgot

But that's only part of today's Chas and Milla commemorative blog. Because the other issue that's got some column inches is this whole business of the pair of them renouncing their "mainfold sins and wickedness". Now, I'm afraid at this point I'm sitting here smugly saying, "I told you so". Hmm, let's see... Yep, there it is in the Language Legend archive, blogpost Jan 2nd 2005, explanation of why the language of the bible is a hot topic.

The heat it's generating is all to do with attitudes to different varieties of language, and to do with how much language change is considered acceptable when publishing or preaching the Bible. And here's the future monarchic head of the Anglican church saying "don't gimme that modern junk". Y'see, as a divorcee, to get his second marriage blessed, he has to say a prayer of penitence. Like, "Oops, sorry, I made a bit of a mess of the first one, please let me off, and can we just forget the whole adultery thing cos after all, I am hot-blooded male and Milla's a foxy chick, and what else could we do, oh lord?" Nope, not good enough: Chas and Milla are going all the way with the 1662 Book of Common Prayer, which will see them asking God for forgiveness in the linguistic equivalent of a good whipping.

Check out the discussion in The Times here:

Charles and Camilla to admit 'sins and wickedness' in service

And have a flick for yourself through the 1662 Book of Common Prayer here:

The 1662 Book of Common Prayer

But, I hear you muttering into your Frosties, what's the Big? Well... All this is taking place in a context of debate about appropriate forms of language for religious expression. Except that now the debate is a bit more heated because a couple of new editions of the Bible have been published. First up is Today's New International Version, which sets out to make the holy text more accessible to the modern reader, and to avoid some of the tricky issues of language change. So, it's out with "aliens" and in with "foreigners"; bye-bye "Naboth has been stoned and is dead", hello "Naboth has been stoned to death". So, that clears up that bit of confusion about dope-toking extra-terrestrials, anyway...

New inclusive bible translation launched in UK

But that doesn't go nearly far enough for some people, and so watch out, here comes As Good As New: a radical retelling of the scriptures. This one gets the thumbs up from Dr Rowan Williams, the Archbishop of Canterbury, who sees the translation's power as lying in the rugged contemporary language it employs. Here's an example, first the usual Authorised Version, then the new version:

Matthew 23:25
Authorised version: “Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!”
New version: “Take a running jump, Holy Joes, humbugs!

How 'bout that for changes in language and style over time?!

Check out this link for more:

Radical new translation makes bible accessible to unchurched

So, as you watch Chas and Milla today, remember that not only is the man a royal studmuffin (check out Language Legend blogpost February 10th if you're now choking on your Frosties in disbelief), he's also a man of heated political conviction who directly opposes the Archbishop of Canterbury - who is going to bless his marriage!!! Now what was all that business before with kings, archbishops and getting rid of turbulent priests?...

Vive la republique?......